Recent Comments

1. 1 day ago on Herb and Jamaal

   Like the old joke: A guy finds a magic lamp. The genie says “You get three wishes, but know this: Whatever you wish for, your ex-wife will get double!” The guys says “Give me a billion dollars!” POOF! He gets a billion, his ex-wife gets 2 billion. Then he says “I wish I had a big mansion!” POOF! he gets one, and his ex gets two. The he says “Now, beat me half to death!”

2. 1 day ago on Crankshaft

   Because apparently in Ohio, there’s nothing better than getting a signed book.

3. 2 days ago on Randolph Itch, 2 a.m.

   Well, it IS only 8 1/2 by 11…

4. 2 days ago on B.C.

   My friend’s sister was dying of cancer. She lived in Texas. He was visiting with her, and they saw a scorpion on her bed. She (rightfully) freaked out! They lost it, and she made them tear apart the whole bedroom looking for it.

5. 2 days ago on Ziggy

   We used to have an accountant in my town. He was …ahem… a bit of a drinker. Every year come mid April, there was a line of angry clients pounding on his door, just trying to get their paperwork back, as he hadn’t done their taxes yet. Often, he was hiding under his desk!

6. 2 days ago on Luann

   Pretend you’re in your room talking to Bernice. That’s when the pathetic details come out!

7. 2 days ago on Crankshaft

   There must be a commemorative plaque- “Famed Cartoonist Batton Thomas lived here!”

8. 2 days ago on Crankshaft

   “I never did get back my security deposit, you cretin!”

9. 2 days ago on Crankshaft

   “Your” landlady, not “our” landlady?

10. 3 days ago on Dick Tracy

    The Smith & Wesson Identikit was the standard for composite sketches since the mid-60s. It was moved to a digital version before I retired. You start with a basic form, based on male-female, weight, height, race, hairstyle. That gives you a baseline, and you ask the witness, “What do you like about this?” They tell you the eyes were different or nose was bigger, etc. and you swap out based on their description. If you get a witness that exclaims “That’s them!” right off the bat, then you know they are making it up. It used to be a badge of honor when the suspect was caught and they looked really close to their composite.