Recent Comments

1. about 2 hours ago on Crankshaft

   TOM slams down menu: “So! Your kids menu has dino nuggets and fish sticks on it, but not a SINGLE CHILD basted in it’s OWN JUICES?! GET ME YOUR MANAGER! Or I will take my nightmare horror spikes to CRACKER BARREL!”

2. about 5 hours ago on Crankshaft

   Slowly sliding down a spike, while Vlad the Impaler enjoys breakfast.

3. about 5 hours ago on Crankshaft

   Skip, sorta singing: “Hey, I just met you and this is crazy, but here’s my number, so impale you on a spike, maybe?” (She runs away, dialing 911) Skip: “Gotta work on my pick-up lines. How about ‘Is Heaven missing an angel? Cuz you like something that DIED! On a SPIKE!’ Yeah, that’s it!”

4. about 6 hours ago on Crankshaft

   I blame the bulldog from the Tom & Jerry cartoons.

5. about 6 hours ago on Crankshaft

   And the paper & pen she was using yesterday has now become a notepad & stylus. Dang these small-town reality inversions!

6. about 11 hours ago on Crankshaft

   He was sad that he had lost so many customers after he spent all that money to move to Nebraska to found Omaha Stakes.

7. about 12 hours ago on Crankshaft

   “STICKS NIX HICK PIX”—Variety, July 17, 1935. TOM: Always on top of the latest trends!

8. about 12 hours ago on Crankshaft

   SKIP: “Remember how I said that no one reads our newspaper? Even though it’s a sheet of A4, folded in half, so that you can only read the headline, so you don’t notice that the rest of it’s just one coupon for $5 off an oil change at Jiffy Lube, and then 39 coupons that say ‘BUY LISA’S STORY?!” (now shrieking) “I hope—NO ONE FINDS OUT! That SUBSCRIPTIONS NEED TO BE—SPIKED! SPIKED! SPIII—III-KED!” (brings out a big ol’ spike) (She does not react. As she is just a cardboard cutout. SKIP mumbles “Tomorrow, gonna get my money back from the Spike Depot”)

9. 3 days ago on Crankshaft

   I thought on Sunday that if today had Ed, it might finally turn back into CS. If it involves comics or author inserts, the Funkvasion will continue. Think she’s going to shadow Skip the Dip to part 3 of the Battom Thomas interview?

10. 4 days ago on Crankshaft

    You should say that to the guy who commented on The Real McCoys: “inane — as always”. What a miserable old geezer he must be!