When I was a kid, my mother and I trapped a live mouse in a shoebox after our cat dropped it in the house. After some consideration, we drove it to the mall and released it near the dumpsters.
Dinkle started as a caricature of band director as drill sergeant. Fleshing out his character made him into a narcissist. And selling turkeys door-to-door was clearly a formative experience for Batiuk, but he writes about it so much that he seems not to understand how few people have ever encountered a “band turkey.”
My recollection is that he is 13. Not even in high school yet.