Martian tartan

Ugly, Fat and Crabby Free

Recent Comments

  1. 8 days ago on Daddy's Home

    “Well, I’m not Mark Twain, so I have met people I don’t like.”

    Of course you’re not Mark Twain. You’re Miss Scarlet.

    But what does Mark Twain have to do with anything? Or are you thinking he’s the one who said he never met a man he didn’t like? It was Will Rogers who said that.

  2. 13 days ago on For Better or For Worse

    Psych! He got you good!

  3. 17 days ago on La Cucaracha

    “Sure, but if you’re going to be interviewed, you oughta know what you’re insisting on.”

    They figured out a long time ago that it doesn’t matter to their followers. They not only don’t respect knowledge and qualifications, they actively disparage them.

  4. about 1 month ago on FoxTrot Classics

    So, Jason has been an anti-social little rat bag since he was an infant. I wonder if maybe his brain was starved of normal nutrition in the womb. Ya’ know, they way Andy prepares meals, there’s not much there to help a growing fetus thrive.

  5. about 1 month ago on The Lockhorns

    You can’t buy alcohol at a self-checkout kiosk. At least not any of the places I’ve seen them.

  6. about 1 month ago on Herman

    True story:

    Customer: I need a new windshield wiper.

    Counter person: For what kind of car?

    Customer: A Chevy.

  7. about 1 month ago on Baby Blues

    She doesn’t look irritated to me. She looks pretty OK with it. She’s just letting Darryl know that she heard what he said.

  8. about 1 month ago on Wallace the Brave

    Wallace, could you just one time not take it so far??? There are limits to everything.

  9. about 2 months ago on Angry Little Girls

    Some days I only get out of bed is because there’s something good for breakfast. Otherwise, I might stay in bed until lunchtime.

  10. 2 months ago on Crabgrass

    “He was lying. He was never switched.”

    Was he lying about the ice cream truck, too? I have a feeling that Kyle never speaks the truth, just as a matter of course. He’s just a contrarian.