Ted Rall for February 11, 1999
Transcript:
What a bizarre scene! Democrats- repeatedly sold out by Clinton- defend him to a man. (Man: His welfare plan creates millions of homeless people... his free trade balls are causing deflation... how can we not forgive him for lying about oral, sex!?) Meanwhile, Republicans- who have gotten everything they ever wanted from the president- are rabidly opposed to the guy. (Man 2: True, I'm worth millions more because of Clinton's pro- G.O.P. policies- but he's still got to go!) (Man 3: Damn Democrats! They just don't get it!) Now parties promote people, not ideas. They push "their" guys regardless of loyalty to their platforms. (Man 4: Chill, Bill- we'll stand behing you as long as that Democratic party membership card sits in your wallet!) So the parties are dead, guess what's next? (Television: From now on American politics will be based on a candidate's preference of house pets.) (Man 5: But that's stupid!) (Woman: Silence, guinea pig lover.)