Ted Rall for December 29, 2001
Transcript:
Confessions of a traitor (Man: Everything I did, I did as a patriot.) "When I first went to Afghanistan, the Taliban was backed by the United States. Naturally, I wanted to help our friends. (Man 2: It's true, John. Your government is so twisted that it's funding people who hate all Americans.) (Woman: You can count on me, sir.) "While I was there, the Taliban and U.S. broke up. But I didn't know... Afghan newspapers suck! (Woman: But Osama- they're wearing U.S. uniforms!) (Man 2: No, they're not.) "Fortunately some friendly special ops folks set me straight. (Woman: Please don't kill me! I'll give you all my parent's money!) "I started helping my country right away, but patriotism is seriously hard work... (Woman: No, scroll past that... it's just Mullah Omar's Ramadan card list.) It's so darn hard to keep up with our allies!" (Woman: You want me to go after Saddam? But he's our ally!) (Man: That's so '90! But we're thinking of hooking up with him again.)