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Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for January 14, 2012
here comes santa claus amid tight security, santa claus arrived today for his annual christmas-related visit. santa: ho ho ho. the press and public were kept at a distance as aides hustled the jolly old elf from one appearance to another. press: what about allegations that you've sold lists of who's been naughty or nice to multi-national corporations? are you real? can my kid have barbie's hair salon? santa: ho ho ho. spokeself tinky defrost read a prepared statement. press: how do you spell "tinky"? is "harry potter" racist? tinky: i'd like to address concerns regarding santa's schedule this year...