A’s for arthritis,
B’s the bad back,
C’s the chest pains - perhaps car-d-iac?
D is for dental decay and decline,
E is for eyesight, can’t read that top line!
F is for fissures and fluid retention,
G is for gas which I’d rather not mention.
H is high blood pressure - I’d rather it low;
I is for incisions with scars you can show…
J is for joints, out of socket, won’t mend,
K is for knees that crack when they bend.
L is for libido, what happened to sex?
M is for memory, I forget what comes next.
N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low;
O is for osteo, the bones that don’t grow!
P is for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I’ll be good as new!
Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu?
R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears,
T is for Tinnitus - there’s bells in my ears!
U is for urinary… big troubles with flow;
V is for vertigo, that’s “dizzy,” you know.
W is for worry - NOW what’s going ‘round?
X is for X ray, and what might be found;
Y is another year I’m left here behind,
Z is for zest that I still have - in my mind.
Elderly Alphabet:
A’s for arthritis, B’s the bad back, C’s the chest pains - perhaps car-d-iac?
D is for dental decay and decline, E is for eyesight, can’t read that top line! F is for fissures and fluid retention, G is for gas which I’d rather not mention.
H is high blood pressure - I’d rather it low; I is for incisions with scars you can show… J is for joints, out of socket, won’t mend, K is for knees that crack when they bend.
L is for libido, what happened to sex? M is for memory, I forget what comes next. N is neuralgia, in nerves way down low; O is for osteo, the bones that don’t grow!
P is for prescriptions, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I’ll be good as new! Q is for queasy, is it fatal or flu? R is for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears, T is for Tinnitus - there’s bells in my ears! U is for urinary… big troubles with flow; V is for vertigo, that’s “dizzy,” you know.
W is for worry - NOW what’s going ‘round? X is for X ray, and what might be found; Y is another year I’m left here behind, Z is for zest that I still have - in my mind.