Ted Rall for July 17, 2004
July 15, 2004
July 19, 2004
Transcript:
While we're at it: The divorce prohibition amendment bans marital separation and retroactively remarries couples who have split up in the past. (Man: But I've been divorced 4 times!) (Woman: Guess what: We just signed you up as a Muslim!) The defense of premarital friendship amendment prohibits wedding without signed approval of 2/3 of friends of both spouses. (Man 2: If you married Karen, I'd encourage you to cheat.) (Man 3: Heck, I'd hit on that bitch myself.) (Man 4: Ok, Karen's out. Could you support me marrying Kim?) The defense of marital gender roll amendment mandates that husbands and wives conform to dress codes and behavior appropriate to men and women, respectively. (Man 5: You! Yeah, you and the man! Drop the baby!) (Man 6: Yo, "wifey" step out of the pants and put on a skirt!!) The defense of marital longevity amendment imposes fines for behavior that jeopardizes a marriage. (Man 4: A ticket for $418.75.) (Man 5: Cost of the watch you should've bought your wife for Christmas 1999, plus interest.
