Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for December 13, 1998

Transcript:

the ouster of a politician is not a pretty sight. these unfortunate souls are unable to shift from the behaviors and strategies that served them so well in public life. take the case of phil peterson who recently lost his seat in the u.s. house of representatives. the first thing he did was spend $4 million, including a television as campaign, in an attempt to get a $60,000-per-year job. mr. sloan, if you're watching: hire phil peterson. the right man for today's sloan real estate. once he got the job, he spent 100% of his time devising sound bites that put negative spins on his internal rivals' plans. how about: flaherty's new client is d.o.a.-- deadbeat on arrival!" the results were inevitable. peterson, you haven't done a single positive thing since i hired you. you're fired! i understand perfectly. you're telling me that i want to spend more time with family. he then lowered his sights and spent $500,000 on a campaign to get a $6.00/hr fast-food job. but his instinct for legislation padding finally made him unsuitable for that job. i'll have a hamburger and a small fries. i'm adding a large coke and an apple pie. and you'll have to accept that if you want this to pass! give generously to the ex-politician's fund! a donation of just $1 million can give an ex-politician a start on re-election to a $135,000/yr job.