Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for June 11, 2008
Transcript:
Guard Duck: Good morning, sir...I have your morning briefing, sir...That's where I update you on the comings and goings in the front yard, sir. Pig: Oh, okay. Let's hear it. Guard Duck: Item one: The front porch light is broken, sir...item two: The front hedge needs trimming, sir....oh, and item three...uhhhh...I've declared war on Venezuela. Lemme guess. You're wondering how the porch light broke.
Guard Duck: It was a funny story: I tried to trim the hedge with my infamous RPG, but I missed and it destroyed a Venezuelan embassy, and they tried to kill me, but I made short work of them, the only collateral damage being a broken lightbulb.