Since we’re pretty evenly divided (politically) here in America, I managed to offend half the country last night. However, neither half knows for sure who was actually dissed. Oh, well. Not my problem. Here’s something that may offend a whole new set of folks:
A man goes to visit an old friend who has retired onto a farm. As he walks around with his farmer friend, he sees a pig in the barnyard with a wooden leg. “What’s the story on that pig?” he asks his friend.
“That’s no mere ‘pig,’” the farmer begins. “Two months ago, I fell off my tractor, which somehow kicked into reverse. My ankle was twisted; I couldn’t get away. I was about to be run over when that pig came charging in out of nowhere and dragged me to safety.”
“OK,” the man says. “But what about -”
“Last month, my youngest son fell into the well, and that pig came running to me and grunted and oinked for me to follow him. I did, just in time to save the child.”
“But -”
“And just last week our house caught on fire. That pig squealed loud enough to wake us all up, and we managed to escape. That, my friend, is a great pig.”
“But what’s with the wooden leg?”
“Hey, a great pig like that, you just don’t eat all at once.”
Since we’re pretty evenly divided (politically) here in America, I managed to offend half the country last night. However, neither half knows for sure who was actually dissed. Oh, well. Not my problem. Here’s something that may offend a whole new set of folks:
A man goes to visit an old friend who has retired onto a farm. As he walks around with his farmer friend, he sees a pig in the barnyard with a wooden leg. “What’s the story on that pig?” he asks his friend.
“That’s no mere ‘pig,’” the farmer begins. “Two months ago, I fell off my tractor, which somehow kicked into reverse. My ankle was twisted; I couldn’t get away. I was about to be run over when that pig came charging in out of nowhere and dragged me to safety.”
“OK,” the man says. “But what about -”
“Last month, my youngest son fell into the well, and that pig came running to me and grunted and oinked for me to follow him. I did, just in time to save the child.”
“But -”
“And just last week our house caught on fire. That pig squealed loud enough to wake us all up, and we managed to escape. That, my friend, is a great pig.”
“But what’s with the wooden leg?”
“Hey, a great pig like that, you just don’t eat all at once.”