Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for February 03, 2015
Transcript:
uncle richard's suburban myths continued by richard thompson as you'll recall, last week this guy took one nap too many in front of his t.v. and woke up like this. man: uh - oh. man: this is great! now i can watch t.v. all the time! of course, at work the next day problems arise. man: well, if i can't fit in my cubicle i could transfer to the lobby as a full-time couch. boss: chintz clashes with our lobby art. clean out your desk and exit the building through the loading dock. briefly he considers activism. man: i'm gonna address issues of concern to upholstered americans... job discrimin-ation, scotchgard poisoning, cats... speak up for the rights of the semi-animate... start an entropy awareness campaign... maybe harangue some congressmen & meet girls 'n' stuff... instead he moves back in with his parents. oop: it'd be nice if you'd at least fold out into a bed for when gramma visits. ma. now he has to watch their shows. mom: why don't you date someone like that cute wendy rieger? dad: woo man: ma! richard: what have we learned from this little fable? kid: for halloween i'm going as a futon!
Time to change this guy’s name to… Chester Field.