Close to Home by John McPherson for March 15, 2025

looks like the Padres

They’ll need basketball etiquette lessons from Nolan Winter.

“Now move your wad of chewing tobacco from your right cheek to your left cheek. Then spit again.”

Turn your head and cough. They used to tell you that at the pre-induction physical.

Glad to see they are learning the basics.

That covers all the bases.

Next… sunflower seeds!

“All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.”

Charles Dillon ‘Casey’ Stengel

“I managed, I scouted, I coached, I did everything. I was like a house without toilets. I was uncanny.”

‘Rocky’ Bridges

Sometimes the things that the cup is cupping need to be rearranged. Get over it.

Wrapping up a rerun week.

They have a special guest trainer coming today to teach them how to wear their pants. He’s a retired plumber.

Except for the spitting, that’s me year round, though I am always discrete.

The crew that cleans the artificial turf loves the chewing tobacco spit, the wads and chewing gum.

Scratching your crotch in a baseball gave is now verboten!! . Not that I have even done it. lol Girls just don’t do that. GROSS!!!

Baseball…. Past. Time.

They have healthy “ptooey”tery glands.

There should not be a number 42. 42 is retired by all teams in honor of Jackie Robinson.

Scratching the crotch while waiting to bat…….

And don’t forget to scratch your rear

Did he mention rearranging the cup?

Adjust your batting glove about thirty times before getting in the box.

They get paid for this???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

Training for the pocket pool team.

This must be the Boston Crude Sox. It’s definitely not the Angels.

I find it ironic how many people operate under the assumption that the players are just “grabbing themselves.” Those that think that are either unfamiliar with the equipment required, or, have just never been hit in the “lower regions” with a 90 mph baseball.It’s simply a matter of “occasional adjustments,” which become necessary. When I fenced, I even wore one, as some of the newer fencers were not always in great control of the blades.